Personally, I have abandonment issues, along with all the other quirks, personality flaws, and disorders that I also endure. For many years, I struggled to understand why I was so afraid, and why I was feeling unloved. Over time, I’ve realized where these struggles and feelings are coming from. My childhood has framed the woman that I am today, fears, anger, anxieties and the ability to be loved.
Feeling unloved has deep roots
Unfortunately, feeling unloved is a product of a dysfunctional childhood. I’m not saying that all parents are horrible and abuse their children causing unloved feelings, but many do. In fact, only 30% of children from healthy families actually get by without unloveable feelings of some kind. It’s just difficult to find the balance.
To understand the correlation between the past and our feelings today, we have to examine multiple connections between the two. Here is the way this works.
Afraid of failure
Have you ever noticed how terrified you are at failing a test or failing in a relationship? In many cases, a history of failed relationships can contribute to the fear of failure, but there are other reasons as well.
For one, a childhood of feeling unloved can cause decades of fear. The lack of proper parenting, including neglect, makes a child, then an adult, afraid to try new things. They just always see a negative outcome.
Nonexistent trust
There are many adults who do not trust others or situations. This characteristic can come from many things in the past. Trust issues stem from the destruction of trust in a relationship or repetitive event during life. Parents who cannot provide the love that the child needs can taint trust at an early age. This child can carry those trust issues well into adulthood, damaging future relationships.
